Thursday, November 26, 2009

Non Article Blog

Happy Thanksgiving…Normally I would have an article from the newsletter I put out for the Lee County Shrine Club. This month I opted to forgo the writing and simply put a series of pictures of our annual magic show. It was a busy day, but truthfully it was a lot of fun. I couldn’t walk the next day. My legs give out much easier now and my right ankle was really frozen and painful. So all I was really able to do Sunday work on the newsletter. I did include a public relations article on Shrine membership. I honestly try to keep this newsletter fresh for the readers. After almost ten years of producing a monthly newsletter that can be a challenge sometimes. I try to add various elements that will keep people interested in reading it. I find that more women read it quicker than the men. I get more feedback from the women.

The ladies involved in the Shriners are just as important and productive as the men. It’s a shame we (the men) haven’t found a way to “officially” add them as members. Freemasonry being the base for membership prohibits women from joining. Not that I am advocating changing one of the base landmarks in Freemasonry; but, after more than a hundred years plus the public aspect of Shriners International, we should have found a way to make the women’s role more official, at least on the club level.

We do have some movement in the Shriners big picture, a couple of new web sites, www.shrinersvillage.com and www.beashrinernow.com. The first is for Shriners and requires membership to enter and the second is a public promotional website. Being a Shriner is a position of service. http://shrinershq.org/

This year’s magic show included a child identification program; the MSCHIP program sponsored by the Grand Lodge of Mississippi. This is a good program and the odds are we are going be responsible for the recovery of a missing/abducted child.

Our magician was from Madison, MS, Dorian LaChance. He was very good, entertaining and energetic; both the kids and adults enjoyed his show. Our timing was off with the addition of the child ID program. Originally we didn’t need a break between shows, I guess we do now. I think our error was that our original magician didn’t put on as long or as good of a show. Next year we will adjust. The last show started an hour late, but it was because we had fifteen boys from the Tupelo Children’s Mansion show up for the noon show and it took awhile to process them all through the ID program. Only one lady got mad and we were able to serve the waiting audience food before the show instead of after.

The delay didn’t faze Dorian; he put on the third show with just as much energy and excitement as the previous two. He put on a show that made the crowd forget the waiting time. I enjoy dealing with someone with a good work ethic. Those boys from the children’s mansion stayed after the show and helped stack the chairs. It all worked out fine. One thing I noticed about this magician, he had the timing required to obtain the predictive response from the kids in the audience. This skill allowed all the kids in the audience to feel involved in the show and he did without being too unoriginal. I saw even the shy, introverted kids open up and get involved.

Even though my legs were hurting, I was able to go home in a good mood about the show, plus I got to see some cool magic tricks. www.magicbydorian.com
www.mansionkids.org

Today is a day for family and friends. Christy has to work part of the day, retail. Holidays used to be about the holiday and celebrating; now it is about increasing sales. Everything is on sale plus stores expect increased profits. Makes you wonder about the actual value of the product in the first place. What is the cliché? You can go broke saving money.

Have a happy holiday and drive safe.

Monday, November 9, 2009

Mysterious Ways

There is an old cliché stating “God works in mysterious ways.” It’s true and to those who don’t believe that, I feel sorry for you.

I normally avoid any religious discussions on purpose. Religion is often a major source of argument and disagreements. I believe that religious beliefs are “extremely” personal and totally individual. I am sure I am very open-minded about religion much more than most people and less than a minimum few. I don’t think I was put on this earth to judge who is right or wrong concerning religion. I will not tell any believer they are wrong and other than an atheist don’t think anyone is wrong. I certainly would not engage in an argument with an atheist. I am a strong believer in “free will.” The book I am reading explains that the Druid sun god was born on December 25th. That doesn’t mean that it is blasphemy and certainly there can be parallels in pagan beliefs as well and Christian beliefs. One thing humans have is the free will to believe or not to believe; plus, God does nothing to interfere with that human privilege. Free will is a gift.

I guess what caused my feelings of being blessed today is my in-laws. My father-in-law and brother-in-law built a special trailer to pull behind a four-wheeler so I could ride into the woods to deer hunt. They know I have bad legs and made this effort to help me. I didn’t ask them to and didn’t expect it. They just thought it up and built it. When Christy and I went by her parent’s house this afternoon, they were outside. My father-in-law couldn’t wait for me to see this trailer and we actually finished it this evening. It is rather a neat little design.

My point is that I am married to my third wife; the first two didn’t work out too well. I had come to the conclusion that I would forever remain single and really never expected to be married again. I had dated a few women but basically they weren’t much to brag about either. My good friends had formed a committee to screen any potential partners in an effort to prevent me from any further bad relationships. I was told that not only do I attract the crazy ones, but I would talk to them too.

Then boom, five years ago I met Christy. She lost her first husband to a tragic illness. I remember when it happened and knew about it from my friends who were kin to her first husband. After she moved back to Mississippi to help with her parents after her father’s heart attack, we met. Long story short, we slipped around and went out while her sister- in-law who is the wife of a good friend was in the hospital having a baby. The relationship stuck and developed. She is much younger than I am, but that obviously hasn’t made a difference. It has been a wonderful relationship and a great marriage. My family thinks the world of my new wife. Her family and I also get along great. I must be doing something right, they built a special trailer for me. This is really the first true “in-laws” experience I have been allowed to have. My previous two wives didn’t really want me around their parents. I guess they were afraid the fact that I’m not really Satan would come out.

I don’t act any differently around my in-laws. Any time they have asked me to do something, I have always responded happily. It is easy to be myself. We have shared a lot of laughter and fun over the past almost five years. I am very grateful for this gift of a good marriage I have been blessed with. I guess the secret is to not look, but to drop back and allow faith to take place.

I always feel weird when someone does something nice for me. I guess I am more experienced with conflict. I always think it is my place to be the one to do something nice for someone else. It was a lot of fun helping them finalize the construction of this trailer and figure out some of the details. Hopefully we will also have to use this trailer to haul a deer out of the woods this year.

My only advice is to count your blessings. Don’t take a good marriage, parents, children, friends, or positive relationships with your in-laws for granted. Not everyone has the same benefits and until you know otherwise you really have no idea how blessed you are.

Monday, November 2, 2009

First of November

The last few days I have been in a good mood, which has not been normal for the first of November.

Last Friday I made a crock-pot full of chili which turned out nice. I used some beef loin rather than ground beef. I didn't make it spicy as per Christy's request but it turned out delicious, even if I say so myself....

Saturday I went with my Bother in law to get my new rifle sighted in by a gunsmith. He was closed, so Christy and I went back today. This guy lives out in the boonies but uses a computer and a special mount to sight in scopes. I will go test it out before I go hunting. My Father in law swears by this guy's work. This gunsmith also used to make knives so it was a fun visit. BUT that is not why I was in a good mood rather than my usual All Saints Day depression.....

On November 1st, 1981, my first wife left with my two children stating she would return in three weeks. She said she was going to visit with her Mother in Oklahoma giving me some relief while I found a job. I had been laid off a couple of weeks earlier....She failed to return. It is not easy to explain my first wife.

Long story short and avoiding various details and nonsense....I lost contact with my children and had no idea even where they were until last year.....I got a hint they were in Pennsylvania in 1995 but I never actually found them. Efforts were made to prevent me from knowing their location....all it really did was increase my desire to find my two children.....I searched.....for years I searched.....

The Internet aided me in my search efforts but for years I had no luck.....I even drove through Pennsylvania looking through telephone books but with no luck.....

Fast forward....I finally found my daughter last year on the Internet and called her up....The first of July 2008.....We immediately connected or reconnected and have enjoyed a wonderful father/daughter relationship....even though we live a 1000 miles apart, she has a wonderful husband and two beautiful daughters of her own, we stay in contact. I was able to visit with her this past April and we enjoyed a week together....

Now that this is the second November I am enjoying after reconnecting with my long lost daughter....I noticed the absence of the depression I had for so many years not knowing...for 27 years I faced each Halloween and All Saints Day feeling bad because I was missing out on my two children....Now I don't have that situation anymore.....

My son still hasn't decided if he wants to reconnect and I have to give him time and room to decide...He was only two months old when I last saw him and he really doesn't know me. Plus I am sure he hasn't been told anything good about me...Maybe someday.

Thankfully I have my daughter and thankfully we were able to reconnect. Now we communicate through various means on a regular basis. The initial phase of reacquainting is over and our communication is a regular habit....We don't focus on the past or the whys. We live in the present and enjoy knowing each other. We share a lot of laughter and joint happiness.

My good mood replaced the sadness of the past. Now having a daughter is normal. In the past year and a half we have had several telephone conversations, e-mails, Twitter and Facebook messages....(Several is putting it mildly more like a whole bunch and more). I have an entire sub-directory of photographs of my granddaughters....My daughter set up this blog for me.....I finally get to tell her I love her and she can hear me....I never forgot her or denied she was mine....Maybe someday my son will wake up and see who I really am...

Now this November came about with a different tone. My thoughts and feelings are different....thoughts of my children are different now....I can focus on other things and know that whatever those thing are I can always talk to my daughter about them. I can tell her the silly things I said, we can laugh and share.....My father died in November 1993 and I even miss him...I wish I could tell him about my daughter and his great-grandchildren....I look around this year and see new babies in our family.....parents and children should not be separated....Do not take your family for granted...You might not realize what you are missing until you have lost them...and if you are ever denied your children or parents you will understand...I was lucky in having a second chance with my daughter and trust me I don't take it for granted....I am saddened by my son's reaction but out of respect I won't hound him....My daughter just had a birthday in October. She said her husband said she was getting old but I told her no, this was only the fourth birthday I have been able to tell her Happy Birthday....

Now I can call my baby girl up and tell her about the chili or the scope sighting or my wife's new niece or my new great-niece or the Shrine Club or anything....any I am sure she will fill me in on my granddaughters and the large cartoon characters she saw this past week.

I like this new November....feels good.....